If you’re looking for a surefire way to plunge into poverty, you’ve come to the right place. This comprehensive guide will walk you through the most effective strategies to empty your bank account, destroy your credit, and ensure a life of financial struggle.

First and foremost, embrace impulsivity. Make major financial decisions on a whim, without any careful consideration. See a flashy new car? Buy it immediately, preferably with a high-interest loan. Stumble upon a “hot” investment tip? Throw your life savings at it without a second thought. Remember, the key to poverty is acting first and thinking later – if at all. The more reckless your choices, the faster you’ll find yourself in financial despair.

Financial discipline is your enemy. Live well beyond your means, rack up credit card debt like it’s going out of style, and avoid saving at all costs. Why worry about tomorrow when you can have everything you want today? Prioritize immediate gratification over long-term financial health. If you happen to come into a high income, make sure to spend it all as quickly as possible. Nothing says “future poverty” like an empty bank account and maxed-out credit cards.

Personal discipline? Throw it out the window. Cultivate bad habits and make poor choices your constant companions. Substance abuse is a great way to drain your finances and impair your judgment simultaneously. If you’re feeling particularly ambitious, why not try infidelity? It’s an excellent method for destroying your family and dividing your assets. And don’t forget to surround yourself with negative influencers who encourage reckless spending and risky behavior.

In the spirit of reckless behavior, embrace gambling with open arms. It’s 2025 as I write this, and mobile gambling apps are all the rage. Install them all on your phone and spend hours trying your luck. Remember, the house always wins, which is perfect for your goal of becoming poor. The more you lose, the closer you are to your objective! The thrill of losing money can be exhilarating; after all, who needs financial security when you can have fleeting excitement? And your spouse will (and probably should) kick you out at the same time, so you can be double poor. 

Education is overrated. In fact, why bother learning at all? Ignore financial matters, industry trends, and personal development. The less you know, the easier it is to make bad decisions. And speaking of bad decisions, make them consistently. Overspend on luxuries you can’t afford, ignore your health until medical bills pile up, and if you’re feeling particularly daring, dabble in some illegal activities. Nothing fast-tracks you to poverty quite like legal troubles and fines.

Laziness is your new best friend. Why work hard when you can do the bare minimum – or better yet, nothing at all? Hard work might accidentally lead to success, and we can’t have that! Instead, cultivate a lifestyle of inactivity and apathy toward personal growth or career advancement. Your bank account will thank you by quickly approaching zero as you sit back and watch opportunities pass you by.

If life throws you a curveball like a health issue or economic downturn, don’t adapt or try to overcome it; instead, use it as an excuse to give up entirely. Remember that resilience is the enemy of poverty; embracing defeat will keep you firmly on track toward financial ruin.

Should you find yourself inspired by stories like Walt Disney’s comeback from bankruptcy, do the opposite of what he did. If you fail at something, stay down; never innovate or take risks again. Avoid expanding your vision or seeking new opportunities; stagnation is the name of the game when it comes to ensuring your financial downfall.

Avoid building any kind of financial foundation; budgets are boring and restrictive so don’t create one. Live above your means and scoff at the idea of an emergency fund; who needs preparation for unexpected expenses? Why prepare for the future when you can be caught off guard by every minor setback? Embrace chaos in your finances; it’s much more exciting than planning.

Lastly, surround yourself with people who are as committed to poverty as you are. Seek out friends who encourage reckless spending habits and share their own tales of financial misfortune with pride. Avoid mentors who might offer sound advice or good practices; instead, laugh in the face of financial planning and responsible decision-making.

With these strategies firmly in place, you’ll be well on your way to a life filled with financial ruin. Congratulations! Poverty awaits you with open arms! Embrace this journey into destitution with enthusiasm; after all, there’s nothing quite like living paycheck to paycheck while drowning in debt.

Remember that every poor choice compounds over time; each impulse buy chips away at any semblance of financial stability you might have had left. As debts accumulate and savings dwindle away into nothingness, revel in the thrill of watching your life spiral downward. With each passing day filled with poor decisions and lackluster planning, you’ll find yourself closer than ever to achieving that coveted status of being broke.

So go ahead—make those impulsive purchases without thinking twice about how they affect your future. Dive headfirst into that gambling addiction while ignoring the warning signs! Surround yourself with toxic influencers who celebrate mediocrity! By following these foolproof steps toward poverty diligently, you’ll soon discover just how easy it is to achieve financial despair—and perhaps even find some twisted sense of pride in being part of this exclusive club!

Now on a serious note.  It is possible through no fault of your own (or maybe it could be your fault) to get poor.  It happened to millions of educated and disciplined people during the Great Depression.  It happened to Walt Disney.  It happened to tons of rich people.  And sometimes when you have “skin in the game” it can happen.  Although unlikely for you, let’s accept it as a possibility.  It’ll suck, but you can’t dwell on it.  I will tell you a lesson (you may not remember but it happened) that I have taught each of you as young kids every single time when you physically fell down.  I would tell you “you’ll be ok.  Just get back up.”  I taught you that because it’s not only true, it’s the only choice.  So if you get poor, just get back up, brush yourself off, and start walking and then pick up your pace and run toward your goals.  No worries.  Lots of us have been broke.  You just don’t want to stay that way.